Fierce as "Spring" 3.13.16
With the arrival of spring comes an awakening. A desire to believe in what we cannot see.
A hunger for miracles. A stirring to pursue forgotten dreams. In spring a fierceness is reawakened.
A powerful intensity comes back to life as we see resurrection take place in nature around us.
Maybe, just maybe, resurrection is for us also? Maybe our fierce spirits, that we came into the world with, ready to believe and ready to fly, got crushed and got cautioned, got disappointed and broken.
When I look up and see the blue sky, the sun shining, nature in its unbroken beauty, I feel as though I'm missing something but being given a clue. It is God who helps the flowers bloom, it is God who will restore me and you. I am encouraged that my small and pain filled heart can once again be made fierce to love, and fierce in faith.
I am 8 months into this "Recovering Hope" journey. With this summer approaching marks a one year anniversary of something that turned my world upside down. That forced me to slow down, make changes, and choose better. I have feared, I have fallen, I have despaired, I have loathed, I have cried, I have shouted, I have whispered, I have crawled, I have stood slowly back up. I choose to believe in a God bigger than any diagnosis, bigger than all my medical bills, bigger than my daily struggle.
I choose to believe in Love, though it may have broken me.
To the tired body and weary heart, there is strength you can lean on, His Joy is your strength.
To the doubtful and fearful dreamer, the world needs your big dreams, God made you to dream.
To the wounded lover, you were wronged and it was unfair. But with a loving and gentle God will come healing and forgiveness. And a decision for you to make- to trust again.
This spring I have seen a car totaled, and a better car taken its place. I have seen doctors and chiropractors, and bills come in. I have seen my own heart slowly change and begin to look up again.
I have traveled and discovered farmers markets, the homes of those I work with, and a creative opportunity. I have applied for schools this fall and completed a course I started last year.
All of which I am so grateful for. In the midst of scheming and dreaming I know that my worth is more than the summation of my plans, more than failure and success. I am made in Gods image.
In less than three months time, it will truly take a miracle for me to find another place to live, and be able to afford it. But, miracles can still happen. It is my dream to launch a creative business at the end of this spring. Prayers and positivity much appreciated!
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In honor of spring have a listen to one of my favorite new songs below.
I pray it helps you spring forward!